Thursday, 24 January 2013

Solitude : A social pain!

Solitude most commonly termed as loneliness in our day to day vocabulary medium. A day can be termed as well spent if one has not experienced even a pinch of seclusion. Solitude is not a pain in itself but the form in which we receive makes the difference. If we define solitude in its best form then it is a state in which one is happy without being in company of any one. Solitude is best form of freedom one can ever achieve. But one should not strive to attain solitude for longer duration as there is high risk of solitude concept getting blurred to loneliness, hence the pain begins.
The most terrible poverty is loneliness, and the feeling of being unloved. -Mother Theresa

We are living in universe of multi-billion people, ideally with this fact thought of being loneliness should never get invoke in our minds. But we are experiencing just the opposite. In today’s world millions lives in loneliness or ultimately give up as they could not cope with it. Let’s try and find out what form this loneliness exists and how one gets into this marshy land. Is there any self-mechanisms exists to get out of it? To try and name few forms of loneliness caused due to extreme emotional stimulation; social segregations; too fast rise in status via inappropriate means; and most common is due to character swap. These causes are the creation of loneliness wall which builds around you in place of bridge which symbolizes togetherness. Obviously there are many more form/reasons you have in your minds which I would love to see in comments section if you happen to read this blog. Among the mentioned few origins most common according to me is character and status reversal. We also cannot deny that the lifestyle we are striving for is also a silent contributor to loneliness. From India point of view, we are rapidly moving toward nuclear family system unlike previous joint family system. Even though this remodelling is reasonable with valid/justified reasons such as economic or behavioural/attitude changes to glorify this diversification. But a fact is that human being is getting physically and mentally isolated from their loved ones with the passage of time. Now this separation can be termed as temporary by inference with availability of all other modern communication technology means to keep in touch and feel like home though not physically available. I am in no sense justifying that current is not good compare to later but to do justice with the topic I need to bring all possible contributor of loneliness.

All forms of lifestyle are good and valuable when in good time. But emptiness becomes our unwanted guest in bad times. That’s where we start feeling the needs for our relations, friends and loved ones. The hurried expansion of concrete jungle is sign of our development but the way it is happening or should be happening is something to worry about.  We have to brood over the by-products it is generating such as sense of individualistic, solitude in multitude, we know thousands of people across the world by internet but unaware of our neighbour, we reserve our courage to stop nonsense happening at street but actively gather for candle march. Honour for wealthier one who has zero character value but no time for watching street plays message. Concrete jungle is full with ideas of generating wealth but none to suggest what’s the right path is. All the above expositions clearly suggest that self-mechanism is missing to get out of loneliness.

Human is social animal and it needs another human to help him/her look beyond its minds. When one grow high in status due to unsocial means always end up in emptiness in due course of time. Climbing high should not be your destination but it should be just one of the goals because if you become too ambitious then there will be no one among your loved ones except clam loneliness to appreciate you for getting there. Read about famous ‘mayonnaise jar and 2 cups of coffee’ tale. And Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness.

We can best avoid loneliness by being in company/close to of our loved ones as they will never let you fall prey of malpractice and thought of your love toward them will keep you safe from misbehaviour/misdeed. Hence you would have firm control on character and status rise. Thus end up spending life as well spent life along with pleasure available in this universe.

Thank You!
Satender Kumar Mall
Twitter: satenderiiit


  1. sounds like the common state of mine these days.....but indeed i am enjoying it.......!1

    Solitude is not always conditional but by choice sometimes....and the period does reflects your true self side along with yous deed and perceptions.

    1. Lucky your point of view is valid and hope potential reader will take not of this as well.

  2. nice one

    You have mentioned couple of factors pushing us towards that. FB friends have become common these days than a real one.

    1. In Fact you are quite true. Most of us think World is shrinking but in actual gap is getting wider.

  3. Im lucky enough that i hv some good frnds... Becoz of them i nvr got chance to go in lonely mode... Sometimes i wish to...

    World arnd us has becme so busy....we hardly get time to share thoughts with frnds and family...It drags us towards loneliness..

    “being alone never felt right. sometimes it felt good, but it never felt right.”

    Thanks for writing on this topic .... U have well expressed the depth of it..

    Waiting for ur next post..:-)

  4. social behavior of the humans is part of the brain blueprint. Socialization is needed in order to achieve greater progress and broad information reach, since brain capacity for single Human is very little compared to the whole population acting as one living thing. The biggest question which is bothering me all the time why Humans exists what is our ultimate purpose and who created the life and bio societies. If you look our world you will find out that surrounding world or environment is direct function of our mind and how has been programmed by the greatest programmer in the Universe, which is still out of for us since vast distances in the space. It will be very nice if e can lift our society and set better day to day goals to get understanding of those questions, and one of the ways to get answer for those is to work together as the world society and start exchanging information for achievements faster, so we can build faster and reach faster high havens.
    The nation who manages to spread information faster will get better returns.

    Humans need set new goals, not day to day colorful toys in the shops.
    We need to reach Mind equilibrium with our universe, so we can sustain longer and be happier.

    1. Really great insight Krasimir!!! Reader please read this aspect as well. Thank You!

  5. Really liked your topic . Sometimes we all feel sad but don't know what is the real problem---that is our solitude . Your post has helped many to identify their actual pain of life and find ways to get rid of this pain . We all will accept that this pain hurts a lot and I think along with our family n good friends we ourselves should make efforts to get rid of this pain.

    1. Well said Shruti! Effort should be made to be get rid of loneleiness. As this is something which have no cure when left as it is for long.

      Hope to see your comments on my other blogs as well.